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January 30, 2022
How Counseling Can Help If You Or Your Loved One Has Cancer
When you or someone you know is diagnosed with cancer it can be very distressing. Even if the diagnosis is not fatal, it can still can major fear and anxiety. It is very important that you take care of yourself because these feelings affect various facets of your life.
Finding a counselor to work with to help you deal with the uncertainty is the best approach. Even if you are not feeling super severe emotions, it can still be very difficult to process on your own. A cancer diagnosis is challenging for everyone. Engaging in just a few sessions with a counselor can help create lasting change and make you feel more supported.
Reactions to Stress and Cancer
Everyone is different and everyone has their own circumstances that cause distress. If your life tends to be stressful and busy, it is harder to cope with the demands of cancer treatment. Your distress may be related to other issues, like finding help to get to appointments or being able to provide care for a family member to needs you. If your financial situation is difficult, figuring out how to pay for treatment can make life quite difficult.
Distress can be related to physical problems from the side effects of cancer treatment. It is relatively normal to feel distressed, however, it can be disruptive and reduce the quality of your life.
What Does Distress Look Like
- Avoiding your family and friends;
- Feeling sad or fearful;
- Having financial concerns;
- Difficulty concentrating or remembering;
- Experiencing doubts about your faith;
- Physical problems: lack of sleep, fatigue, and poor appetite.
If these feelings come and go, that is normal, however, if they start to interfere with your life, it is time to receive help.
Cancer may cause a variety of different responses, including:
- Anxiety;
- Fear;
- Anger;
- Discomfort.
You may also be feeling stress and anxiety surrounding treatment and its side effects. Fatigue, pain, and sickness are all very common. Cancer can stir up many personal issues including relationships, sexuality, and spirituality.
Family Relationships
A cancer diagnosis may affect your family relationships. You might find that the way you speak to your children or your partner changes as a result. Your role within your family may change as well, especially if you are unable to fulfill your duties.
Financial Strain
Cancer treatment can be expensive and there are many hidden costs associated. You may need to have difficult conversations with your family members or friends about:
- Making a will;
- Pensions;
- Mortgages;
- Receiving financial support.
Practical issues like transportation or difficulty speaking to your doctors are also sources of family tension and extra stress. Cancer can affect your personal mental health, relationship within your family, your finances, and more. It is so important that you have someone to talk to so that you can plan how to deal with your situation and have a safe space to talk through your thoughts and feelings.
Practicing self-care should be a priority always, especially when you are going through something this difficult. We have many articles on Mental Treat about how to cope with stress, a guide to meditation, and more that may be helpful.
Check them out!
Emotions and Cancer
A cancer diagnosis can cause a range of emotions. Grief, sadness, anxiety, and fear are all perfectly normal reactions. It takes time to navigate what this means for your future and other people in your life. When you are able to meet your mental health needs, you are in the best possible position to manage treatment. It is important to seek professional support if you are having trouble managing emotional distress.
Disbelief
You may feel shocked and numb to the situation when you first hear the diagnosis. It may take some time to accept your diagnosis, especially if you do not feel sick.
Anxiety and Fear
Cancer treatments and outcomes have improved tremendously in the past several years, but hearing the word “cancer” can be very frightening. Worry surrounding the side effects, long-term outcome, and your current situation are normal.
When you are stressed, your body releases chemicals like adrenaline. This causes your blood pressure to go up, your heart rate to increase, your breathing to feel abnormal, and more. The ‘fight or flight’ response triggered by your body may lead to panic attacks.
Loss of Control
You may feel as though you are out of control with what will happen to you or others when you receive a cancer diagnosis. This can be very difficult, especially if you are used to being independent, but taking the support of others is very helpful.
Loneliness
Cancer can be isolating. People are there to support you, but you might feel alone in your diagnosis. Or you may feel too sick to socialize or keep up with activities. It can be hard to connect with people who are not experiencing what you are going through.
Anger
You may be angry with yourself, your doctor, or others after receiving a diagnosis. Perhaps you are angry that you did everything you could have and still got sick. Cancer can start in a variety of different ways and sometimes may not show symptoms for a while. Please do not blame yourself for your diagnosis. No one deserves cancer.
Sadness
Feeling sad after a cancer diagnosis is the most common reaction. You may feel sadness surrounding how cancer will affect your daily routine or your future. If you are so upset you cannot get out of bed in the morning or find yourself losing motivation, you may be experiencing depression. In this case, we encourage you to find a licensed specialist to speak with.
Getting Help
There are many steps you can take to get help, such as:
- Counseling. Counseling helps people respond to their emotions and challenges surrounding cancer in healthy ways. Your oncology team should be able to recommend someone who understands what you are going through and be able to help you.
- Talk to your care team. Your oncology team is also there to assist you in whatever ways you need. Your team wants you to get better as well as you can. If you share your problems with them, they can help support you.
- Connect with other cancer survivors. There is a group of cancer survivors out there who can help you find strength and support. As cancer treatment gets better, this community becomes larger. Support groups and educational programs are great options. There are also buddy programs available that pair you up with a cancer survivor.
We have an article where we concentrate on discussing how and why counseling helps.
When and How Counseling Can Help
When
Counseling is helpful when dealing with any of life’s uncertainties. Living with a cancer diagnosis or caring for someone who has cancer is difficult. Attending just a few sessions can make a difference. The minute you feel that you may need some additional support, reach out to someone.
How
- Managing your anxiety and depression;
- Learning to cope with your diagnosis;
- Feeling less out of control;
- Dealing with emotional concerns;
- Managing fear of the future.
A counselor can also help you talk to the people around you. They may help you:
- Make important decisions;
- Find resources to help you deal with your career or financial concerns;
- Talk with family and friends;
- Communicate better with your health care team.
The Importance of Talking
You may want to deal with your situation in ways the people around you may not agree with. Talking through your feelings with someone outside of your situation can be very helpful. It is hard to get an objective opinion from those on the inside. Although, it is very hard on relatives when someone they love is diagnosed with cancer. They should be able to receive support and when they are able to cope, they can help others cope.
A counselor is there to help you cope. As a confidential resource, a counselor gives you space to be open and honest in many vulnerable ways. If you are reading this and it resonates with you, it might be time to seek help.
What You Need to Know to Find the Right Counselor
There are many different kinds of specialists that provide counseling. Before you begin your search, think about what you want to work through. If you are experiencing anxiety and depression, you may need to work with a clinical psychologist or psychiatrist. If you are looking for general support or advice, you may find working with a clinical social worker or support group counselor to be most beneficial. Be sure to also consider if you prefer in-person, online, or over-the-phone counseling.
Here are some of the best ways to find a counselor:
- Check your insurance company to see who is covered;
- Ask your oncologist or a nurse for a referral;
- Online directories.
The internet is full of many helpful resources such as Mental Treat. Our platform allows you to filter through qualified, licensed professionals to find the right person for you. If you are in need of someone who is affordable and specialize in cancer patient care, you can select those filters on our website. Check it out!
Some helpful articles on how to find a therapist from our blog include:
- How To Find A Therapist Who Fits Your Needs Perfectly: A Complete Guide
- A Beginner’s Guide To Starting Therapy
- The Ultimate Guide: How To Find A Therapist Covered by Insurance
How I Can Pay for Therapy
Counseling can be very expensive, so it is important to consider costs before starting. The costs depend on many factors, including how much training your counselor has and where they work. Private practice counseling often costs more than at a clinic. Group counseling also tends to cost less than one-on-one. Most cancer support groups are free.
Most health insurances will cover some of the costs. However, you may be responsible for a portion of the visits. This is a co-payment. We always recommend contacting your health insurance company first. If you have difficulties paying for your counseling, here are some options:
- Medical school students. Your counselor would be a student who is being observed by a licensed professional.
- Local health departments. These agencies may offer free or low-cost counseling for those who qualify.
- Hospitals or cancer centers. These buildings often offer free counseling to patients.
- Sliding scale. Some local counselors and clinics use a sliding scale to allow you to pay based on your income.
A Word From Mental Treat
When you or a loved one receives a cancer diagnosis, it can be quite overwhelming and scary. Receiving help through counseling is the best way to keep yourself positive and supported. We hope that you find this article helpful and informative in your journey. For more information or support, please browse the Mental Treat website.
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